Can God control you ipod?

(i just put this picture on here because its pretty)

so i was at sari bari yesterday. sewing away happily on my blanket. the weather is starting to cool off and i was starting to think about christmas. i wanted to hear some carols. so i got out my ipod to listen to a christmas song. i couldn't find any.

so i just put on what i thought was random mix and put an ear bug in my ear.

the first song was this amazing song about Freedom. we have been talking about all these things lately like.....freedom in Christ, and finding your identity in God's love etc. etc. and i was like "wow, God is speaking to me". i listend to the song and had a God moment.

Then another song came on about freedom. i was again like "wow!! this is amazing. God is really trying to tell me something"

then i third song came on and at this point i was really really freaking out...."like how is God doing this? this is amazing? i think he really wants freedom for me!!"

it was when i went to turn off my ipod after the third song that i realized instead of putting my ipod on random i had left it in the "F" section because the last song i was looking for was feliz navidad of the veggie tales christmas album.

so God wasn't really controlling my ipod. i just left it on the F section.

however, for a couple minutes i really think i believed that God could control my ipod.

I love iron yoga. i love that when i talk to silas he can ask questions that disarm my defenses. i love that i bought a sling shot on the street to try to hit the crows that stand on our veranda. i love that my brother loves halloween so much. i love that dad and ann are going to visit my brother for thanksgiving and my whole family will be there and i get to call them. i love that today there is a bond and we got a day off. i love that its randomly raining to day (must be global warming)

Going to the village

today was good and bad.
the best was going to see our friend M. in the village. i love that she treats us like her friends. when we don't understand something in Bengal she tries again.
today she took out all her jewelry and showed us the two new earrings she got for the PUja holidays as well as all her old jewelry. us girls are alike all over the world. then she took her nail polish and painted our nails and our toenails. it was just so sweet and normal. we are taking her to the doctors on Thursday because all her test are done...finally (well almost done). but we have her CD4 count and some other important labs. we might be able to work with World Vision to get her some free food and medicine.
pray for her as well.....she has anxiety attacks and is still talking about this spirit thing called jin that visits her. i know that we are supposed to have favorite friends....but she is a favorite friend.

if you could keep the staff in prayer this week. our regional coordinator is coming down to talk some stuff out with us. He has got some mad counseling skills and can ask really good questions....you know those people....who ask you that one right question that puts you in tears.

so.....tomorrow and the next days are bandhs. that is like a strike and the whole city shuts down. i might get the day off. yipeee!!!

i love my new salwar top with sparkles and sequins on it. i love that i get to go on a trek in march in nepal with some really close friends. i love we colored pictures with M. last week and at the age of 24 she colored the rabbit 5 different colors. i love how matthew perryman jone's music pierces my soul. i love that my spell check doesn't include words like salwar and puja.

some pictures

Hey folks,
love reading blogs with pictures so i included a few for you all.
This was our view from breakfast everymorning at the retreat....i know....the suffering.
this is upendrea and radha.....he is our production manager. radha talked about how this trip was a dream come true for her. she had never been out of west bengal before!!!
This is beth and her servant team and me eating momno's in nepal
This is beth, sarah and i on beth's alias birthday. we made her dress like a spy!!!

i love grey' anamtomy. i love chips and salsa. i love my new phone

i love me some kids.....

sometimes i really really love kids. in nepal it was so much fun to be with the kids. there was one little boy that stole my heart.....he was just so darn cute. His name was Elijah. He is silas and kim's little boy. He is so so much fun. He is three and is all boy. we would play tickle monster and both run around screaming from the tickle monster and then both die laughing at each other.
Kim sent me an email today and it warmed my heart. "Yesterday I was listening to Elijah and Jedidiah talking about the retreat. Elijah said, " I like Kristin Auntie." and Jedidiah said, "Oh I know who she is she is the Auntie who has pretty hair that is light like the sun." So poetic.
(jedidiah is elijah's older brother)

is this just such an amazing little comment.
and i got to talk to my best friend, Jessa last night. she put her little girl on the phone and had her say, "i miss you". she is just so cute.
and while we were talking i got to hear jessa be mom and talk to her daughter.
it makes me happy to hear and see my friends as moms. i have the most amazing girlfriends and the idea that they are now moms and are passing on all their amazingness to their children and are so in love with their children and i get to be a part of it all and learn from them about unconditional love and maybe get a glimpse of what my parents feel about me. its cool.

i love my new coconut incense. i love the play list that shiela's brother made her. i love that the servant team now feels like friends not like strangers. i love to see beth and sarah relaxed and ahppy and smiling. i love what we got gita for her birthday.

The HIlls are alive!!

So i went to Nepal for 10 days....and it was great. I can't tell you how nice it was to get out of this city and be in fresh air and mountains and a place with good food. We had the first ever international south-Asia field retreat. SO that meant we brought upendra and his family and kiran as well as beth and the team UPendra wife's told me 'this is something i have been dreaming of my whole life. i have always wanted to see outside of india and see mountains" it was cool to see our bengali staff in nepal.

we spent three days in the tourist part of town and visited some amazing ministries that work with women who are at risk for trafficking or have been trafficked. we met a Brazilian couple who run a home like this. They have been dreaming since the beginning of their work to come to kolkata and take girls back to Nepal. They have been praying for this for seven years. Then we come. They have two girls who have been with them since the beginning and are now ready to come out and minister. isn't that amazing???

then we and the Nepali staff went to the mountains for two nights. it was beautiful. i didn't have my camera so i will have to track down some pictures to show you. there was 48 of us total...and 1/2 of those were kids. i forget what life giving energy kids have.

then we came back on Monday. to kolkata. and i must say that i am happy to be here. the weather has cooled off, puja is almost over, and sari bari was amazing yesterday.
i started sewing my own blanket. and......i am no so good yet. but it was so great to sit around with the ladies and not do work and just hang out with them and the servant team girls. i usually spend a couple hours in the office doing work but i think that i might stop doing it and just sew. it also feeds my creative side.

i love leaving kolkata when i am on the edge of insanity and coming back to it and it feels like home. i love that my ipod is now working again and i can put all my new music on it!!!! i love talking with college kids....or recently graduated college kids. i love being creative. i love that i brought 1 kg (2.2 lbs. ) of yak cheese from Nepal and have been eating it every day. i love that i feel like God is moving in my heart...into the darkness i try so hard to hide.

some good things

we went to the gatch on Friday...it was sad.

so today was good. we are keeping sari bari open on Saturdays for the next month so the ladies will have time to make up for the time they loose during the holidays.

so it was me and four ladies from sari bari today. i loved it. we called it our "choto poribar" (our small family). and the four ladies that are there......i know i am not supposed to have favorites but they are just great. these four imparticular love being at sari bari. they don't make a lot of blankets each month but they love, love working at sari bari. so i love being there with them.

and i got a package in the mail from one of my most thoughtful friends...Laura. she sent me an elephant mask, beef jerky (shared that with some of the ladies who eat beef!!!), an amazing amazing dvd with movies and sermons, some candy and some boas that are orange and blue. i felt loved.

so today was a day when i feel hopeful. love that.

i leave tomorrow for nepal with beth and the team. pray for sarah....the passport situation is almost cleared up but there are no no no tickets out of this city due to the holidays.

i love our indian friend micheal and bopi. i love the book i am reading. i love that i am so freaking tired and can't wait to go to bed. i love that it might be cold in nepal. i love water.

Grey's Anatomy, The Cosby Show, The Office

Yesterday was a holiday. It was some kind of puja here so we took the day off as well. and watched lots of dvd's.
First, beth and i watched the cosby show. which we decided out of all the shows we own is actually the hardest one to watch (although its still my faovorite show of all time):
1. I brings us back to our childhood......i loved, loved the cosby show growing up.
2. bill cosby reminds me of my dad.
3. its all about family. when i was growing up i wanted to be the huxtable family. now i want a marriage like claire and dr. huxtable.
4. i never thought that the cosby show could make me so close to bursting out in tears.....like the scene when theo gets to cut the thanksgiving turkey.

and then all of us watched the office and grey's anatomy (2nd season of both) last night. i was bawling at grey's anatomy. it was so so so so good. i don't know which i am more obbsessed with grey's or the office.
so today it back to reality. sigh.
i am so restless still and am having trouble sleeping.
i love the that bill cosby makes me smile. i love that my cough syrup i took is bright green...like anti-freeze. i love that we get to go to nepal on sunday!!! i love that wheni loan money out and get paid back i feel like some how that makes it free money or something.
i love that i have a family to miss.

Just for fun

the prayer request are just to serious for me right now. I left my coffee mug in my room all day night and day a couple months ago. when i woke up i found this dead roach stuck to the spoon. pretty gross eh? but yet some how really funny and intriguing.

I love when my bengali teacher gets excited about teaching me bengali. i love that it rained today and its cool and i will have to use a sheet tonight!!!1 i love the white chilli beth made for dinner. i love that me acting natural makes steph laugh. i love that my mom called me for no reason the other day and we just got to talk about nothing.

pray for us

Hey all,
Here are October's prayer request. Its been a busy month already....check out the web-site.... www.saribai.com In about six months you will be able to by directly from the web-site. Also, i have left myspace. i have a new blog... www.jesusripsmyfaceoff.blogspot.com check it out...it has lots of pretty pictures.
hope you are all well. drop me a line.

Prayer Request October 2007
Sari Bari
1. We are still in need of a consistent and affordable source for higher quality used saris. Please pray that God would provide an honest and reliable source or multiple sources.
2. Please pray for the two ladies that are in training right now. They have finished three months and are starting their second phase of full time training. These two ladies are the beginnings of our bag unit.
3. We are taking steps this month to register and establish Sari Bari in India. This involves trusting lots of different people and is also new territory for us. Please pray for that this process would be timely and smooth.
4. Please pray for one of our ladies sons. He was bitten by a street dog last week.
5. Please pray for the two ladies, “B” and “C”, that a couple months ago had left Sari Bari but have been reintegrated part time into Sari Bari. Pray for continued healing and redemption. Also, please pray for the one lady we were not able to bring back into the business. Pray that God would move in her heart and she would be able to accept love.
6. The Sari Bari web-site is up!!! www.saribari.com
Brothel Ministry
1. Please continue to pray for our friend M. This past month we were able to take her to get most of the tests she needed. Most of her labs came out fairly normal considering her condition. We hope that this month we can get her initial check-ups totally finished and on her way to getting stronger. She continues to be visited by a spirit called a Jin. It happens when she is alone or is stressed out. Please fight for her in prayer. We want to see M free of this.
2. Please continue to pray for J who lives in a room with many other young girls. We have been talking with her about leaving the trade and going to sew bags at our friends business for a couple months. She is owned so we are not sure about the steps to take toward her freedom from the trade. Please pray for her. Pray God would make a way out for her.
3. Continue to pray for P. Her children are in a temporary boarding school outside the city. Getting them there was a bigger deal then expected and we ran into a few road blocks along the way. However, the boys are there, safe and happy. Please please pray for P. Pray for her as she gets used to not having her children and also for her health. She has been sick for a while now and has lost lots of weight. Please pray that she would overcome her fears and start to take care of herself and her HIV.
4. Please pray for this family we know in the gatch, R (the mother), C (the daughter), and S (the little boy). Pray that has we continue in relationship with them that God would make a way for S into a really good boarding school, C would find a job outside the area, away from her mother, and that R would make choice to not live off the trade. R has a small room she rents out to ladies while also recruiting girls when customers come. Pray for them.


Staff
1. Our entire staff, Bengali and North American, leaves for a South-east Asia retreat in Nepal Mid-October. Please pray for our time there. Pray for language and culture barriers to be overcome and deep friendships to be made. Also, Sarah has misplaced her passport so there is a chance that she might not be able to go. Pray the passport would come in time and that a new flight would be available.
2. Please pray for Kiron as she enters into her second month of her leave of absence. Pray that God would tenderly bring to the surface things that need to be healed and changed. Pray that her body would be restored and she wouldn’t have any more health problems.
3. Please pray for Upendra and his family. He has recently made a deeper commitment to Jesus. He asked that we would pray that him and his family would be protected from Satan’s attacks.
4. We really need more Bengali staff. Please pray that God would raise of men and women to come along side us and love these men and women.
5. Please pray for our staff. We have been hitting some rocky roads. Please pray for God do move in our hearts deeply. Pray that we would have the courage and perseverance to look into our past and accept his healing so we can love each other better. Pray for grace and forgiveness.
6. The Pastor Tea for the Mukhti Campaign will happen on Oct. 31st. The network has invited all the pastors in the area and their wives to come and learn about God heart for the people of the red-light areas. This is monumental. Please pray.

restless

last night i couldn't sleep. watched a storm come in. it was beautiful and a little scary. was exhausted and unsatisfied today. didn't want to be here or anywhere. nothing made me satisfied....felt like a wild animal in a cage. want to go travel and have adventures and be anonymous and learn new things. but for now.
i have to be satisfied kolkata, roommates who let me be stir crazy and love me anyways and three episodes of the office with a garlic chicken burger............
until my world tour that will be enough and that is good.
i love Jim and Pam on the office. i love that Sarah's new staff title is boss of dancing. i love that each of us have a signature dance move. i love that i found a number to take some dance classes but have been too scared to call. i love.........that i am not a person who lived over seas 75 years ago with no email, phones, atm's, computer etc because i would never make it!!!

Did this really happen????

Yesterday morning we got up early and went to the big flower market located near Howrah bridge and bought around 1,000 flowers. Beautiful, bight vibrant sunflowers....one of my favorite kinds. We kept them in buckets in our bathroom. Then at around 5:30ish at night we all got dressed up in our saris and took these flowers and handed them out in the red-light district. It was.......well it was amazing. We did it as an act of war. To try to bring worth, value, love, goodness in a place where women are seen as less. The girls would ask us "why are you doing this? Whose birthday is it? It there are puja?" and with much joy we are able to reply......Its for you. We are doing it because you are important. We are doing this because you are good. We are doing this because you are our friend. We are giving a beautiful flower to a beautiful girl. We are giving a good flower to a good girl. We told them you can look at the flower and remember......you are special.

We got to see girls smile and light up. we got to see some girls look at us like we were crazy. we got to see girl looked a little amazed and confused....."why are you giving me flowers?" Even some of the men wanted the flowers!!!! But none of us were mentally prepared for all this. I am sick, Sarah is sick, we are all busy and all of the sudden we found ourselves in the red-light area passing out flowers....and found myself almost unable to take it in....like i was watching a movie or something.
please pray that the effect of the flowers would be felt for months to come......years to come. Pray for a hope that can't be taken away

I love the mix from ange that i just burned to computer "ange's funky and fun mix!!!" i love my camera i got for my birthday. i love that P saw us on the street and we got to give her flowers. I love the book i just read "acts of faith". i love that i am more comfortable being the giver than the receiver but God calls me to lavishly receive love as well as give it. i love stevie wonder's song "signed sealed deliver".......one more I love the CD that my dad burned for me that is Ray Charles"s duet CD....love it!!! i love that e-blog has spell check.

It's A Beautiful Day

so i am now 31 years old. how kinda weird is that.

i had a great birthday. My roomates spoiled me......like....paid for a whole day for me. the ladies at sari bari blessed me and our bengali staff gave me great thought ful gifts as well.

here are some photos.

i woke up to the theme song from U2 "Its a beautiful Day" blaring in the morning. I was then given a note that asked what i wanted for breakfast. I wasn't allowed to come out of my room yet. I had to wait.

I came out of my room to the site of flowers in the shape of hearts in the hallway....i love hearts and flowers.

Then i started to find notes hidden all over the house randomly. I loved it.

Then i got to open some presents. ITs was really funny. Beth and sarah both got me the same shirt!!!! the red shirt from the Gap that says "Inspired". it's a special name God gave me at the staff retreat. Beth bought me a small sexy one and sarah a little bit bigger one that i could wear here.

we got in a taxi and headed to the tollygundge club. where we layed around all day long by a pool. ate some good food. our friends charolette and jullian came and i got some really really cute earings from them.

Then we went out for a nice dinner.

and then home........

andi will write a blog entry later about what i found when i got home!!! it deserves a whole blog entry!!!

i love sarah and beth and how they were so generous and thoughtful that i could hardly recieve from them. i love that i am about to go make chips salsa and cheese dip...in india!! i love the book i am readin....acts of faith. i love ange. i love michelle and how if i need practical advice she will give it to me. i love that the sari bari ladies got me an elephant top and sparlkly skirt....more pictures to come. i love that i got to talk to my mom for an hour the day before my birthday!!!! i love that in two weeks we are taking our bengali staff to nepal for a staff retreat.