Friday, May 30, 2008

Out of curiosity i googled my name today....and i came to this random websit that told me stuff about my name.....and what it means....its cool.

Forename: Origin: Greek (Root: Kristen)Meaning: Christ-bearer
Surname: Origin: Bold, eager, daring; bright, fair; or may be the same as Kean.

Top 5 Facts:
36% of the letters are vowels. Of one million first and last names we looked at, 47.7% have a higher vowel make-up. This means you are averagely envoweled.
Backwards, it is Nitsirk Neek... nice ring to it, huh?
In Pig Latin, it is Istinkray Eenkay.
In ASCII binary it is...01001011 01110010 01101001 01110011 01110100 01101001 01101110 00100000 01001011 01100101 01100101 01101110
People with this first name are probably: Female. So, you are constantly overcharged for beauty products.

3 Things You Didn't Know:
Your personal power animal is the Vampire Squid
Your 'Numerology' number is 9. If it wasn't bulls**t, it would mean that you are multi-talented, compassionate, and impartial. A humanitarian, you seek opportunities to help others.
According to the US Census Bureau°, 0.099% of US residents have the first name 'Kristin' and 0.0072% have the surname 'Keen'. The US has around 300 million residents, so we guesstimate there are 21 Americans who go by the name 'Kristin Keen'..

I love that laura alley researched my name one time and foudn that my last name also means "one who wails in lamentations". i love that i am about to try a new workout based on some jane fonda old school moves. i love that sarah is having fun in the states but we miss her. i love that jen and craig have their first house!!!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

some new pictures

yeah, this would be andrew and jesse (our nepali cousins) acting natural in their their sweet asian wear.
This would be me in all my glory!!!! this picture would have to be dedicated to laura who has kept me laughing through my time in kolkata by sending me random fun things like these beautiful items that keep me laughing at myself alot.

my friend M came over one day and we took pictures of each other...this would be how i was posed. like i said indian modeling career is about to take off!!!
just a cool moon from out my bedroom window.
this would be my friend M posing in her most beautiful way!! we had so much fun that day!!!

so that is some news.

just some food for thought. beth says to me the other day that God told her "i am forgiving you not because you are a sinner, but because you are my daughter" that struck deep with me. i define myself by my sin instead of by love. it is breaking something in me.

i love manly guys that can do things like fix cars, carry heavy things, and drive motorcycles. i love that i am keeping one SB bag for myself so when i go to the states i can wear it and tell the story as much as possible. i love that today we get to eat KFC and play pictionary with our staff. i love that after talking about how hot it hasn't been......its now freakin hot!!!

Monday, May 26, 2008

some news

so i am puttin it out there....i haven't been able to write really what is going on in my thoughts for the past couple months because....well i wasn't ready to make this public knowledge yet...but here on...its my june prayer letter:

Dear Friends and Family,
I am writing this email full. No so much full on yummy Indian food but filled with so many different emotions. My contract with WMF is coming to an end in September. For the past 3-4 months I have been praying about whether or not I was going to renew for three years or return home. After months and months of prayer and lists and conversations and tears I have decided not to renew my contract with WMF. It has taken me a long time to reach this decision and sometimes it still doesn’t feel real.
I am sure now the next question in your mind would be “Why?”. I wish that I could tell you a specific reason but I can’t. I can though explain to you some of the process of coming to this decision.
Kolkata is a really amazing and exciting, but hard city. I love the relationships that I have here and seeing how God is doing the impossible through these relationships However, I feel like most of the time while I live here I hold my breath and survive. I feel like when I leave Kolkata I take breath of fresh air, come back and fight to be here. It’s really hard to let down and I am constantly on guard. As the time got closer to decide to renew my contract I was able to be more honest with myself about how much this place wears on my soul. However, I had always thought when I left this place I would be moving onto something else; marriage, an amazing job etc. I thought I would have a “reason to leave”. But to my amazement I am not moving on to any of these things. It’s God that is moving me on. Instead of hearing “Fight more. Press on”. I am hearing, “Breath. It’s okay. My grace is big enough to move you on. I am reason enough”. It has taken me a long time to believe that God could move me, when I see a huge need in front of me. I still struggle with feeling guilt and condemnation. But I feel like I am once again finding a God who Is my Father, who looks after me and loves me and protects me and the people I love as well.
I have been able to live out my gifting here in such an amazing way. I am an initiator, a visionary, a pusher (is that a word?), a connector. These are the core of who I am and that is who I have been here in Kolkata. God has used me to be a catalyst in starting SB, to cast a vision for Sonagachi and the network, and has let me push through the darkness for the girls. I have lived out my vocation while I have lived here in Kolkata. I am leaving with a better understanding of who I am at my core. I plan on continuing to live out of my vocation where ever God leads me next.
I know that India and the women here will always, always be a part of me. I am forever changed by their stories, their friendship, their laughter, and their suffering. I carry them with me back to America and will continue to fight for them.
Please pray for me and the staff here. I am finding it really hard to say good-bye and let go. I am glad that I have a couple months for this process. I have poured my life out here and I feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest!!! I am learning how to trust the process and God’s grace.
Words of thanks seems so minuscule for you all, my friends and family, who have carried me though the past 5 years. You have supported me in everyway possible. You have been a part of everything that has happened here. Because of you and your prayers and your support SB was started, 17 ladies have freedom from the trade, hundreds of girls in the gatch know they have friends who will come and talk with them, and a work was started here that will continue even when I am long gone. Thank you on behalf of all my friends here.
I will continue my service with WMF until the end of September. I will be able to collect salary for the next three month after my contact ends to help ease the transition back into America, so that would be until the end of 2008. So if you are financially supporting me I am asking that you would continue to do so until the end of this year, or if you have always wanted to support me and never got the chance now would be a good as time as any! I will have some higher expenses in the next couple months. I am going to have a complete physical and gum surgery in Thailand, travel to Nepal to say good-bye and have closure with the staff and then all the expenses that come with moving somewhere new. It’s a little overwhelming, so I am just asking that you hang in there a little longer!!!
And don’t worry. This isn’t my good-bye letter. It’s just the heads-up keep you in the loop letter. You will for sure hear from me again.
Keep checking my blog (you can also find links to Beth and Sarah’s there as well)
With my utmost respect and love,
Kristin Keen

Sunday, May 25, 2008

good friends

the team is gone. we have a great weekend at the tolly. we swam and ate some beef and watched some really good and bad TV, got to workout in a gym one morning, walk around a green golf course with beautiful flowers. it was a good time.
my friend sent me this email a couple weeks ago and sent me this quote and today it brought my heart peace.........
"When I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do list.He's more interested in what I am than what I do. That's why we're called human beings, not human doings."
still realize how much of my worth is in what i need to get done and what i do. i was excited to get back from vacation so i could once again get back in the fight and feel useful again. its rather enlightening when you see yourself and your neediness, not that much fun but if i let it, it brings me closer to God and closer to understanding of His love.
so to other busy bodies out there.......You are lovely and accepted and wanted no matter what you are doing or not doing. fIts all about the grace. its a scandalous grace. its a grace that allows us to rest. its a grace beyond my human understanding and my job is to accept it.

i love my friend Jessa. i love that when i might get to go to paris!!! i love my brother's faithfulness to his friends and family. i love that has gotten over 96 degrees in over two weeks!!!! it really makes me believe in global warming folks because it should be 113-118 degrees right now!! i really really love the show "beauty and the Geek"

Sunday, May 18, 2008

so much

so last night was the biggest storm ever!!! thank goodness i wasn't home. i was over at our friends house on the first floor and was freaked out just to be on the 1st floor.
i usually love storms but sarah left for the states yesterday and beth was out so i was to scared to go home along because our house tends to get really violent wind during storms. so i stayed on the first floor and watched our friends TV. Do you guys watch beauty and the geek. we saw the first episode and loved it!!! it was so funny and interesting. i am a sucker for "reality tv".

have been thanking God a little bit lately. we are seeing fruit from the gatch that we have waited years to see......P's kids are now in the most amazing school and she has started to ask about work. S's young sister is working at our friends vocation unit and S is making steps to leave the line. M is coming to SB on Wednesday. Little S' s mom is talking about sending him to school.
and these are years and years of pouring into relationships. its soooo amazing. so amazing.
a man told us one time "dream for things you thing you won't see". we have dreamed for the ladies for so long....and we are seeing things come true that i never thought i would see!!!!

oh...we saw Prince Caspian and i loved it!!! its so much fun to see a movie here. the crowd cheers and laughs and we had so much fun. and there is a new hulk movie coming out with edward norton and it looks so good. and indiana jones is coming as well. i love me some summer block busters.
i love paris. i lovet hat yesterday when we were playing scatagories a girl tried to get away with saying a dill pickle was a weapon. i love that Beth and i get to go stay in a hotel for a couple days with the team for their debriefing retreat. i love that sarah get to be at home for three weeks and be loved on and get to go to her good friend's wedding!!!!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

sad things

its just kinda sad in the world right now. there was a attack in Jaipur two days ago, where 6 bombs were set off, china had an earthquake, Burma has a huge storm and the local villages here are having violence where 7 people were killed, including of one the political leader's daughter. so this i what i read all day long when i opened the news paper. they told story after sad story about jaipur (its NW india). 60 people died. its all just sad and overwhelming and makes me question the goodness of the world sometimes. i read this story about how this one man let his two daughter-in-laws and their children off to go to the market and he went to park his car. then the bombs went off and they all were killed. just that split second decision. i guess its the same questions that all mindless violence causes.
life here is good. so busy but so amazing and rich. we talked last night about how life in Kolkata is like a desert most of the time. It can be barren and harsh but there are these really amazing oasis in the middle of it all. so it makes everything good that much more amazing. and while we live in the desert we are forced to have our roots go really deep to look for water to sustain us. i think that is why life her is just so intense and why i love and hate it here.

i love that i bought the hindi song that i am learning a dance too and now it doesn't work on my computer. i love that Michelle is back blogging again. i love how good water tastes when you are really thirsty. i love that it has been the most mild may i have ever had here so far....its only supposed to be in the 90's all week!!! that is amazing for this time of year!!!! i love that we are going to see prince caspian on Saturday.

Sunday, May 11, 2008


this week has been kickin' my butt. it hot season and i forgot how tired you are all the time when its so hot outside. but i really believe its a love- hate relationships with weeks like we just had. it was so full of joys and suffering and busy-ness and amazing and sad things. it was full of purpose and fight and i felt the battle for the girls and what we are doing here. i felt challenged and like i was truly seeing the extent of the battle. and honestly i love it. i love being part of it all. i love the front lines. i love being on this side, even though i am dead tired.

this weekend we did get to rest...its sarah's birthday so we laid by a pool and got our groove on and it was actually really really fun. we got to dance to some hindi music and laugh and it was really great.
tomorrow we are having a party for sarah at SB and everyone is so excited.
sorry this is not really so much a good entry.
i love that i am going to new zeland in october. i love being with the college team that is here. they remind me how amazing my college years were and how happy i am not to be in college! i love the smell of sun tan lotion. i love that my mom is the greatest mom ever and i miss her so much today.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Lost and then found

so for about 48 hours i thought i had lost my passport. it was not a good 48 hours. you all know that feeling...that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach. i swore that i had lost in some where in the city. but was in my room the whole time. and not only in my room but in my desk chair. how it got in my desk chair i have no idea??? how i didn't see it in my desk chair? i also have no idea. but i can tell you when i found it i jumped up and down with more joy then i have in a long time.
but in the process of my loosing my passport i decided to clean out my room so maybe i could find. i clean my room regularly here but i hadn't really really really cleaned it in well....1 and 1/2 pull everything down from shelves etc.
and i discovered many things:
1. i found the necklace that Kim gave me that i love sometimes more than life itself!
2. i found the earring i thought i had lost from my dear friends Charlotte and Julian.
3. i have 6 bottle of deodorant.
4. i have four things of lotion.
5. i have enough of everything i need.

so now my room is really really clean, i have my passport and two important things i thought i lost are now found. Wahooo!!!
i love that i saw Iron Man on Saturday and loved it!!! i love that it rained again last night and i had to use a sheet last nigh. i love that we have a team hear of 11 girls from indiana Wesleyan college. they are so sweet. i love that we got an email from Charlotte and Julian today!!!