poverty sucks

words just feel so empty to write about my day. so empty to describe how rich, amazing, hard and life-giving life is right now.
spent my time between the gatch and my friend's house in the vilalge...M. if you know M...we have been friends with her for yeras and years. her sister got really sick after having her baby a month and 1/2 ago so she was admitted into the government hospital. she was septic. she died thsi weekend. If you know M's story at all its marked by lots and lots of sad stories She was trafficked, she has HIV, her father left her family. and nothing that has happened to her is fair or right. poverty sucks. there are layers upon layers of reasons why her sister died like she did and why M life has taken the turn it has.
we didn't get word that her sister had died until today. so we went to her home. and we got to sit with her and talk with her. her mother has taken down all the idols in her house. she talked about how she cried out to the gods and no one heard her. she said that she told the gods that if they saved her daughter she would be faithful to them. but her daughter died. but listen to this....the only thing she didn't throw out of her room...was a cross. it still hangs on her wall.
we talked with them both about how Jesus understands your suffering because he suffered. M remember when she was working at our friends business the movie she saw about Jesus and said she remembered. we didn't make any promises to her that God would heal her or make her life perfect and great....we told her that God suffers with her and He suffers with her and for her because He loves her.
she processed some things about her sister's death. she told us that she can only remember bad things her sister sad. she say she doesn't really believed she has died. most of the time she thinks she is at her mother-in-law's house and is coming home soon.
however, through this experience M wants to see a dcotor and start getting better and wants to work at SB or our friends business.
what am i trying to say........what i am trying to say is that sometimes Jesus is like a fart at a funeral. when someone farts in the most inappropriate times it sometimes bring laughter where there should be no laughter. it breaks the tension in a room and makes people remember good and funny things.
that is what today was like......Jesus showed up in an inappropriate place today. He showed up where there was no hope and gave hope. He brought an inappropriate joy to where there should only be sorrow.
and i know its such a crude way to talk about Jesus but it makes sense to me. and my words just seem to failing right now but i will just say it was a '"farting at a funeral" kinda day. and for those of you who understand....awesome and thank you.
i love that beth made me laugh really hard lots today. i love that M laid in my lap today. i love that farting makes me and my brother laugh more than anything else. i love when in the midst of such immense sorrow God can show me hope in the tiniest things. i love that you really can make a difference in this world. i love that for the first time ever in kolkata i realize how many trees this city has. i love that my nut obsession is finally going away.