i really am not interested in politics, but it seems that everything is political. i try to listen to NPR in the mornings and sometimes in the afternoon. but sometimes i have to change it b/c it makes me sad and worried. but this morning as i was listening i almost broke down in tears. i have been listening and following what is going on in mexico with the drug related violence and it breaks my heart. they said that 6,000 people died this year in drug related deaths. it has shut down tourism, shut down cities, and caused an already trouble nation even more trouble.
and this morning i heard that mrs. clinton was visiting. and mrs. clinton exposed america. she actually admitted that we are the ones feeding the drug problem. we are the ones selling illegal firearms to mexico....she took responsibility for us. it was awesome. she talked about how in this global world we all rise and fall together.
i think it was the first time i heard america admit its part in something. so it gave me hope. maybe i am just naive and this only has political motivation, but maybe not.....maybe we really want to make decisions in our country not made in isolation. maybe we want to make mexico a better place to live, maybe we want to empower mexico so she can stand on her own two feet and people can be free not to live in fear. maybe.

it's funny. after living in community for the past five years i kinda see things different. I see how dangerous it is operating out of isolation, with the "I" being the most important factor in the decision. I think all of us move towards this tendency. I know america does. I know i do. I remember how hard it was to put the focus off of me and make a group decision (ask my fellow fleshies how not good i was at that!!) i had to learn how to slow down and consider others. i had to learn how to let people confront my selfishness in my heart. but i find here, its so so so so easy to hide. and even though living in community was one of the hardest things i have ever done i believe that its what God calls us too, b/c when we are community there is accountability. i believe that yes, we hurt each other in community through the intimacy of relationship but i also feel like community protects us, protects the world around us, protects the people with less power, protects us from ourselves. i miss it.
so my prayer for america, for the church is the same prayer i pray for myself....that i would move from isolation to community. to not make me the center, but others. Lord, help me.

i love beth and sarah. i love my $1 dollar sunglasses. i love the way NPR tells stories. I love the amazing spring florida is having. i love that when i do something right at work. i love being able to give and love in the same way that i have been loved. i love rob bell.